mr flowers didn’t survive the winter

I guess its time….

I obviously can’t talk about everything that is going on in my life. A girl has to keep some secrets right?!?! 😉

So if we back up a bit… I haven’t seen Mr Flower’s since October (this  is the last time he was here) Even though there has been skype, it just wasn’t the same.

In December, I was suppose to head to Kansas to visit him and his twin girls. The night before, he canceled. There is a lot going on in his life, and I understood. Well it happened again just a week ago. After a lot of thought, prayers, and tears, I realized I wasn’t a priority in the relationship anymore. It has been going on for awhile.

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I decided I deserved to be treated better.  It was extremely difficult, especially since I believed that he was “the one”

decision

of course, family and friends have there for me.

My friend Shannon sent me this, just as a reminder that you shouldn’t wait around for the wrong one

Mandy, my sister in law, and I are going shopping this Sunday. A girl always needs to shop

 My dad has been helping me with my house. And my mom has been asking me constantly how I am doing

All my friends have been texting and calling to see how things are going. Amanda is trying to get me out there already haha

laughter

Even with all that help…..the songs, my house, food, you know everything, reminds me of Mr. Flowers. I know it will just take time, but it has been really hard. I also need to stay busy and one day I’ll be ready to get out there.

171207223303764336_5bESzeXE_cTomorrow is a new day, and hopefully with each day, I will be stronger and back to my happy self. My biggest  fear is ending up alone. (and I’ll be the old cat lady on the block haha)

I have been going to yoga and working out. Its time to focus on me (and andrew) for a little bit 🙂

Question for you:

What is your favorite inspirational quote?

One Flaw

Yesterday was one of those days.

It started w/ the first snow for St Louis (can you believe that!?!!? January for the first snow). Well, it was a long and slow commute to work, but I made it all in one piece.

Work was not long and slow. I hit the ground running when I first came in at 7 am, and it didn’t stop until I clocked out at 19:30 (hey at least I was on time! haha) THe baby had had today, was just not having a good day….at all.

The day also started w/ news that one of my good friends lost her baby. She and her husband have been trying for awhile to get pregnant. and I was so happy when we finally got the news! She was actually in my house when she first told me. I send all the prayers and love in the world to her and her family.

After this, I also knew I needed to talk to Ryan.  I never like to have this conversation. To say “This just isn’t going to work”. Even if I have only been talking to someone for a few weeks, it still feels like a “break up”.

Then on the drive home, I got a text from Andrew’s dad. and it wasn’t very nice. Let’s leave it at that.

So here I am going down the highway at 40 miles per hour, trying to not get hit by anyone on the slick snowy roads. And also trying not to pass out because Im Exhausted! And I began to cry. (LET IT OUT GIRL! haha)

I went and tucked Andrew into bed, and talked with my mom. She was an ICU nurse back in the day, and talking with her always makes me feel better. And then when I got home, I took a bath. IT WAS AWESOME! and I checked my email. And my mom had sent me this:

 

God doesn’t give you the people you want; He gives you the people you NEED…to help you, to hurt you, to leave you, to love you and to make you into the person you were meant to be.

I LOVE YOU!!!!!

One Flaw In Women

 

 
Women have strengths that amaze men…

They bear hardships and they carry burdens,

but they hold happiness, love and joy.

They smile when they want to scream.

They sing when they want to cry.

They cry when they are happy

and laugh when they are nervous.

They fight for what they believe in…

They stand up to injustice.

They don’t take “no” for an answer

when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have.

They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel

and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about

a birth or a wedding.

Their hearts break when a friend dies.

They grieve at the loss of a family member,

yet they are strong when they

think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss

can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

They’ll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you

to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what

makes the world keep turning.

They bring joy, hope and love.

They have compassion and ideas.

They give moral support to their

family and friends.

Women have vital things to say

and everything to give..
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,

IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.  

The thing I found ironic, she sent this to me this afternoon. Before she even knew I was having a rough day. I swear, sometimes, we received something just when we need it!

Question for you:

Your awesome in many ways, what is one of them?

-I wear my heart on my sleeve. Which is pretty awesome (even though it gets wounded more easily)