Im not kidding. i am lost in many ways, but especially without my camera. I don’t even know what to post without pictures (because really who wants to read my post without some good pics? haha)

Anyway, I do have a silly video, but first thing is first. UPDATES

Most of these updates are stressing me out:

  • Moving THIS weekend!!! (finally) – This will be my FIRST time living by myself. EVER.
  • I still haven’t found my camera- a few more calls and emails tomorrow
  • I have no money- see every house post there is on here, then you will know why haha
  • In one week, I will get my blood drawn again- see why here
  • Ian and I are not going to be together- its a long story.

                                 I don’t even know where to start or how to say it, and several friends in the NICU have seen the tears, we don’t need to go into it. (basically he is the same guy that wants different things than me, and has different priorities. It still hurts ALOT. I am an optimist and I always try to see the good in people and thing positive. (sometimes I can be a negative nancy, but in the end I know everything works out) Ian and I have known eachother for 8 years now. I thought maybe he had grown up.Realized to put other people first. Unfortuantly that is not the case)

Being single stresses me out. Plain and simple. Not because I know I can’t do it. I have been doing it forever. I was the kid who always played house w/ a mom, dad, and a bunch of kids. I was ALWAYS the “mom” whenever I played with other kids. Heck. Im a nurse who takes care of babies ALL DAY. I love kids and wanted to have a million four.

Yes. I know I am only 26yrs old. But I saw myself in a very different place just a few years ago. So its been hard for me.

  • I was signed up for a triathlon this saturday and can’t do it- basically I haven’t been training either I have been too busy, tired, or lazy. I also dont want to squeeze my 30 extra lbs into my tri outfit. But Im still going to cheer on a few people I know
  • My to do list is long. I feel like Im being stretched in too many different ways
  • Moving. I know I said this one, but moving away from my parents. I KNOW. I KNOW. My mom and I bump heads A few times….here and there. BUT I will miss them. I also will have to get use to locking the doors (dad usually does this) cleaning everything (my mom and I do this) paying for everything (eek!) and it is going to be SOOOOO quiet (although andrew does make a good amount of noise haha. And burglars scare me!


  • I still have 80 emails in my inbox. haha THis one makes me laugh, but really having that many emails is not cool. When I told my friend Nicole this, she looked at me and said, “you know how many I have? 11,000!” hahah apparently she doesn’t check this email address

Ok. now im going to try and get this video to upload. its of Andrew trying to “surf” down the sand dune in Michigan


well off to bed-Goodnight!

The secrets out! (and one to come)

Well now its official!

My lovely NICU friends (or I should say some of them) have found my blog!

I was wondering how long it would take for them to find it, since we happen to be PRETTY big on blogs there in the NICU, especially Spring Garden. (for my non-NICU friends, this is the section I work in. There is also water garden, summer garden, and A, B,C, and D room. Its a big place! We can hold around 80ish babies!)

So welcome! I hope you guys leave comments (NICE comments- Anna haha)


I also have another surprise. This one will be a bit of a shocker for my family (not you guys though)


Ian (my son’s dad) and I, who have been talking for several months, finally got together this past Tuesday. I was EXTREMELY nervous about this, as it was the first time in person talking.

What if it was akward?

What if we didn’t have to same chemistry? (yes girly. I know)

What if I realized this wasn’t what I wanted, or vise versa?

Well. there were lots of unknowns.

But it went perfect.

We sat in the kitchen and talked for three hours. Just catching up on life and of course, my house! 🙂

(yep. I got a guy to talk for three hours! haha. )

And he was actually engaged in the conversation. This might not seeem like a big deal to some, but this was not the Ian I knew before. 

We eventually held hands, while watching Pawn Stars. (anyone seen this?? not me. it was actually interesting)

(AND we are teenagers again, watching Tv while holding hands haha. but it was perfect. I said that already…oops)

I left at 1230, because I worked on Wednesday (had to get up at 545! EEK! )

Before getting in my car, he did give me a kiss 🙂 and a text that followed approximately 2 minutes after I was on the road saying he was glad we were able to get together. And that he hoped we could get together soon 🙂

So fast forward through the rest of the week…..we have talked each day And have plans to get together on Sunday.

Now that everyone is caught up.

My parents are not a big fan of Ian. I can say this because, well. Everyone knows it. They don’t hide it. When we first met at 18, we were both really immature. We also had a baby at 19….you can see why they werent thrilled.

So tomorrow, I have to tell them that we are meeting (they didn’t know about tuesday). I know this is not going to go well.

And unfortuantly, my biggest fear, is that a lot of people going to be pissed.

this is my life we are talking about! My happiness! But Im the middle child. and try to make everyone happy haha

As my good friend Sarah says “HERE GOES NOTHING!”


I feel that everyone is caught up with that, so lets get on to the house!!!!!!

Tonight, my brother and I went and bought trim!!!

saturday night…… and Im hanging with my bro at home depot haha

Im not going to miss dropping $$$ at this place! At least Im not at this phase anymore!

We had a lot of good laughs, especially when the 12 foot wouldnt fit……except out the window!

“this is how we roll”

AND TOMORROW! I get to paint it all! WAHOO!!! Then off to the pool with Ian.

Question for you:

Have you ever done something that you knew someone was going to hate, but knew it was right for you?

Or have to tell someone something you didnt want to?

Are you a middle child?

Birthday week + cabinet update~!

Hi everyone! Sorry my blogging has been completely crazy this week. Trying to get my house ready for my bday party on saturday resulted in no sleep, hardly having time to eat and no exercise. Well unless you count pulling up tree roots

 (yep. this happened. in 95 degree heat. yep. Im stupid. haha)

Anyway. I had a pretty good birthday. I turned 26 yesterday (it feels the same as 25 hahA)


Friday and saturday were a blur. All I ate on saturday was a banana, apple, and then dinner that I made for the party. It was so wild because I was cleaning the ENTIRE house and getting the kitchen put together. But I think pictures work best!

 The cabinets are in, but I will post pictures about that tomorrow. All that work, deserves its own post 🙂





Flowers to get my house all pretty!


Flowers from my friend Adam

my mom made my cake! Funfetti of course!

Having a party, can be A LOT of work. Especially when trying to finish up a kitchen. It isn’t finished by any means but its starting to feel like a real house now! I need a new counter top, and then I will be moving in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today, was LOOOOWWWW key. I didn’t end up falling asleep last night till 230am!! who am I? I was up texting my son’s dad……….yep.

Anywho, today included sleeping in, heading to the pool

And then I went to get my birthday present

I got a trimmer from my parents for my birthday. Funny-yes. Needed-defiantly.

Nooowwww to learn how to use it haha

Andrew had a blast.

Now im watching Iron Man, and going to bed. I work tomorrow, and my goal this week is to get sleep and get to the gym!

Question for you:

How did you spend your weekend?

For your birthday, do you prefer practical gifts?

Before and After Pictures

 Nope. I didn’t fall off the end of the earth.

Ive been doing some painting and yard work, on top of working.



Then after work, I have been sanding and priming my kitchen.

AFter the sanding, before the primer!



So basically my days including:

– getting up at 545.

– Taking my son to daycare and getting to work around 645.

-Working till 730

-Painting kitchen till 11

– bed

Notice not much sleep in there?


I ALSO have an updated on the conversations I have been having with my son’s dad.p>

Anyone even care?? haha

Ok. Well we are now both singles and both talking. who knows what will happen, but I feel happy

I hope you all have been having a great week! More pictures to come- the yellow goes on the walls tomorrow!!!!




Today was another blah day, but I made it through.

Before taking the WONDERFUL long and painful CPR class at work, I ate my fav egg sandwich w/ PB and banana.

Then finally home to hang out with my little dude. Of course that was cut short, because we had to take my dog riley to the vet

tired from a run

It wasnt a big deal, but he has been itching like crazy and his skin is BRIGHT red. We think he has allergies.

He was nervous while we were there, stayed RIGHT by me and yelped when the vet came in
Sorry its blurry, he was moving around like crazy!
At least we did have some nice wall paper to look at….

And of course this lil fellow came along

then it was time for some poison.

Ok not really. Just a green smoothie. I wasn’t really hungry for dinner, but I wanted something smooth and cool.

LIKE ICE CREAM?? well considering I didnt work out (besides playing some bball in the front yard)

I knew I needed to eat something healthy. I do want to be in the 180s this week!!

I am only 1/2 way through! Ive been listening to some rockin’ music

The website I have been using is groovesharp.com. YOU. NEED. TO. CHECK. IT. OUT. Its awesome

I just made a country playlist. Im having one of THOSE days haha

SPEAKINNNG of songs.

I was told to listen to this song by my ex. That this is how he feels about me

Never be the same by REd

sorry I wish I could put the video up here, but I dont know how 😦

(rewind) We have been talking recently about how we still feel for each other. Nothing has happened. I think we are both just trying to talk and figure out whats going on, before doing anything.

Anyway, we are suppose to get together and talk. but I told him that he can decide when and where…..that was this morning (still no time or day) and Im getting antsy already haha

Andddddd Ive listened to this song about a million times

Question for you:

1.) Do you have a song that means a lot to you?

2.) have you eaten something that doesnt look too good, but turns out awesome!

Thursday Eats and Yoga

my son had some AWESOME sprinkle pancakes for his birthday, I opted for blueberry/banana pancakes. DELICIOUS

At noon, I had a 1/2 of a turkey subway sandwich with lettuce, tomato, cucumbers, and peppers.

I took my son to the pool, so after that I need some lunch! I had three meatballs on an open sandwich, watermelon, and corn

My son had been picked up by his dad (they are going to the lake) so I took a nap! It was AWESOME, except it was cut short. I woke up to go to yoga with my mom and neighbor.

Im so glad we went! It was defiantly what I needed. The only bad thing was, Amy, the lady leading the class. Did A LOT of downward dog poses. Im not a big fan of them. It just feels akward and I dont feel that I get a good stretch.

When I got home, I showered. I WAS SWEAATTTYYY. And I had so much energy! I went through ALL My son’s toys. I had a trash, keep, and donate pile. It felt so good to weed out the toys he is too old for, or are broken!

It was 9pm and I was starving. I hadnt eaten in about 5 hours. So I listened to my awesome sparkfriends and got some protein!

Open egg sandwich. While checking my email.

Calories: 1501

Carbs 187

Fat 55

Protein 73

WOW. Pretty good on all categories today. And this doenst even count the calories burned at yoga! WAHOO!


Surprisingly, I am not that tired. (ITS 1130!!!) because last night I was up till 3am. Nope I wasnt at a bar or out with friends. I was texting. My son’s dad and I were talking about him, their trip this weekend, the past. Basically everything. (hence the reason we were texting for four hours!) I dont know what it means. Or where things will lead from here. Maybe we just needed to talk. have closure. or become better friends, so we can work together to take care of our son. Or maybe one day we will get back together. Who in the world knows (well GOd does) thats why I have been doing a lot of praying.

Many of you have been there through EVERTYHIGN that has happened. (well at least what I have time to blog about haha) . But I want to be honest what is going on in my life. At the moment, I just know that God is guiding me. I can feel him here, because I just have this sense that Everything Is Going To Be Ok. (whatever that my mean haha)

Now I am off to bed, with the hopes of no text messages and sleeping in late!

Question for you:
what is your favorite yoga pose?

Hello world!

I have missed you blog friends!!

But I have been one BUSY BUSY lady!

FIRST AND MOST IMPORTANT! I bought a house!!!

Ive been running around like a mad women buying stuff.
(ok really MOST of it was fun haha)

Then I met my ex fiancee’s new girlfriend. And its been rough.

I didnt know she was going to be at my son’s baseball game. I ended up crying on Friday night for a good two hours.

(thats my mom and dad in their younger days! arent they good lookin? haha)

Then it was mother’s day!! I had a great day, except I woke up sick and unable to breath through my nose. No good.

But I did get an awesome card!

The inside was the best part!

My mom is46 years old. (Im really 25 haha)

My mom’s favorite food is mushrooms (true but I LOVE ice cream )

My mom’s favorite job is being a nurse (VERY true. except for being a full time mom)

My mom’s favorite TV show is the weather (I dont watch much tv, but when there is a tornado, Im ALL over that!)

Mom likes when I hug her (of course!)

My mom cooks the best macaroni and cheese (I do make a mean dish of mac and cheese haha)

I like to help my mom clean (good bud. cuz we have a WHOLE house to keep clean)

I like to go to Target with my mom (Ive created a monster)

My mom looks pretty when she has her purple dress on (it is my favorite! You can also see the picture of me in my purple dress in his card!)

I know my mom loves me because she kisses me (I love giving kisses)

I love my mom because she gets me legos (the boy does like legos haha)


I hope you all arent mad that I have been MIA.  Ive been throwing myself into the house. First to stop thinking about the ex, and to get my house looking B.E.A. utiful.

I have also been sick the past two days and have been living on this!

Question for you:

What is your favorite food when you are sick?