Sometimes its cloudy

There are no secrets around here. (ok. maybe a few) But when it comes to weight lose, working out, and eating healthy, I’m an open book. I struggle. The 30lbs that I have been trying to lose (since I gained it back 2 years ago!) is still here. I’m frustrated with myself that it isn’t coming off. It is up to me! And I can’t seem to do it. The sense of being a failure is there everyday. I see other people losing weight, and I think “see they can do it! why can’t YOU!”
 
negative thoughts crowd my mind. And with swim suit season  it makes me want to move to Alaska.
 
My son is starting to notice people, and their sizes. He doesn’t say anything negative, he just observes. He must hear me or my mom talking about losing weight, because he mentioned how much he weighed. (he is a bean pole!)
 
I grew up with a mother who is overweight. I LOVE my mom, and she was always there for me. She was an amazing person, and her weight never bothered me. But sometimes her weight got in the way. Now even, she can’t run far or fast to keep up with the grand kids. I don’t want to be an overweight mom or grandma. I want to set a good example.
 
I want to be healthy!
 
My goal is to find a way to be healthy. Not lose X amount of weight, but to eat what is right for MY body, to go to the park with my son, play basketball, and eat healthy because I want to, not because I need to (ok. I need to, but moving on haha)
 
recently, I have found a few things that I hope to help me along the way….
 
  • Gretchen at honey I shrunk the gretchen is pretty awesome. She lives life to the fullest (and is hilarious!) she is also going through her own roller coaster of weight lose. She definitely gives me inspiration!
  • Janetha talks about balancing your life. But enjoying to the fullest! It doesn’t have to be eat your veggies, workout etc etc. Here I learned I need to get back to setting goals. I used to race in half marathons, triathlons,a nd now I workout because I want to lose this weight. Its time to make it fun and alittle competitive! Also, I need to relax more, my stress it just hurting me!
  •  Caitlyn at healthytippingpoint mentioned adding “juices” to her diet. Here is the rebootwithjoe. I don’t think I will go for 5 days on JUST “juice” but I think if I added it as a snack, it would be a great way to get in my veggies! She also mentions working out on vacation, which I will need because we leave soon for the beach!
  • My cousin also mentioned she was doing weightwatchers online (she needs to lose like 5lbs…) so I have thought of that, but the idea of using money for that just doesn’t appeal to me. I have to get my property surveyed this week. 450 bucks. (another stressor) I have started faithfully using sparkpeople.com. I used this site when I lost 30lbs (the first time haha)

I’m sorry this is such a long (and maybe boring) post. I don’t mean for it to be that way, but I had to get it out there. It isn’t always happy and sunny over here. Now its time to kick butt, get sweaty, and eat healthy!

Thanks for listening 🙂

Question for you:

Are you struggling with anything right now? How do you overcome it?

Overboard

Today was definitely a wild world of emotions.

I won’t go crazy with the details, but this weight lose thing, and stress from life (plus little sleep) its been overwhelming. Yep. thats the best way to describe it.

I started with breakfast: 2 eggs, peppers, sausage, and 2 slices of bacon

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Snack: cashews

Andrew and I headed out for a few hours to visit a cute baby! This was definitely the highlight of my day (besides playing tennis with Andrew this evening)

Lunch was at 3pm! A huge hamburger, american cheese, bacon, and 1 egg

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Dessert: brookside dark chocolate pomegrante

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(then a million undocumented cookies from trader joe’s)

So many cookies in fact that I didn’t eat much the rest of the day…

After a cookie overload, and a dressing room disaster…I was two seconds away from crying. Well it happened. My cousin/best friend and I were talking about this weekend, and then I just couldn’t stop. After an hour or so, I was feeling MUCH better!!! And I left with a game plan.

Here is to a GREAT TOMORROW!

Question for you:

How did you spend your Friday?

Is there anything you go “overboard” eating?

Easter Egg Wreath

The past week has been a little rough. Today started out with cartoons w/ Andrew, but then I went to church. A great new church with my friend Chrissy. Her son is in school with Andrew.  And while there, I started crying. No joke. I have been really stressed about a lot of things. I am still exhausted, and this weight is not coming off. I am feeling overwhelmed.

Onto happier things. I ate alot better today and I even got in a pinterest project (and much faster and easier than the bathroom idea haha)

My brother’s girlfriend Melissa and I both wanted to do this wreath project!

First row

second row

Then place a few on top to cover holes

Final step is to place grass into spaces

Andrew took the picture of Melissa’s.

With his three star wars Easter Eggs haha

Ready for Easter

Andrew getting out of the way for the picture haha

Question for you:

Do you celebrate Easter?

Will you do any crafts?

 I would love suggestions 🙂